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Joyce Leinart Find out more about Joyce Leinart
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  • Larry
    replied
    Re: new element found

    I'm just an impartial science reporter doing my job. Fair and balanced reporting.......just like Fox.

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  • Joyce Leinart
    replied
    Re: new element found

    Larry,
    Thank you for confirming the rumors I have been hearing since 1990....that a moron was found in that location in 1989 and an attempt to clone that particular moron was made. I heard the attempt wasn't entirely successful as the one remaining neuron was lost in the cloning process. There are rumors a second attempt to clone was made; the results of this attempt are unknown. The state of Florida somehow seems to play a role in the mystery.

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  • Lisa Salberg
    replied
    Re: new element found

    Gee Lar, are you suggesting you are unhappy with our current administration... I am shocked

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  • Larry
    replied
    Re: new element found

    They have also discovered an isotope of Administradium where one of the morons actually serves as the nucleus. It was discovered in a chair behind the desk at the oval office.

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  • Glen Beamish
    replied
    Re: new element found

    Good one Joyce.
    We've had that in our office for years now.
    As a matter of fact I was in meeting the other day and was surrounded by them, they bombarded me from every dirrection, now I know what they are called.

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  • swinand
    replied
    Re: new element found

    You really had me going for a second, then it sunk in. In some cases pretty true. Thanks for the chuckle.

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  • Joyce Leinart
    started a topic new element found

    new element found

    New element was found
    Administratrium, The New Element

    AMES, IA--The heaviest element known to science was recently discovered by materials researchers at IPRT/ISU. The new element, tentatively named Administratium, has no protons or electrons, and thus has an atomic weight of 0. However, it does have one neuron, 125 assistant neutrons, 75 vice neutrons, and 111 assistant vice neutrons. This gives it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together in a nucleus by a force that involves the continuous exchange of particles called morons.

    Since it has no electrons, Administratium is totally inert. However, it can be detected chemically, since it impedes every reaction it comes into contact with. According to its discovers, a tiny amount of Administratium caused on reaction to take over four days to complete; the normal reaction time is less than one second.

    Administratium has a normal half life of approximately three years, at which time it does not actually decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which neutrons, vice neutrons, and assistant vice neutrons exchange places. Studies have shown that the atomic mass usually increases after each reorganization.

    Research at other laboratories indicates that Administratium occurs naturally in the atmosphere. It tends to concentrate at points, such as governmental agencies, large corporations, and universities. It is always found in the newest, best appointed and best maintained buildings.

    Scientists point out that Administratium is known to be toxic at any level of concentration and can easily destroy any productive reactions where it is allowed to accumulate. Attempts are being made to determine how Administratium can be controlled to prevent irreversible damage, butresults to date are not promising.

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