Driving

[bryan]

I was just wondering if people here with HCM think a remark of "I dont think Bryan should be driving with the baby in the car, cause he has a bad heart" is a uncalled for. The reason why IM asking is cause my fiances aunt made this remark and it REALLY irked me. The Dr's have never told me not to. To me in all honesty it doesnt really matter bad heart or not, anyone in the world can pass out at any giving time due to MANY different issues. Any reponses, opinions, or statistics would help.

Thank you
Bryan

[Linda]

Re: Driving

Bryan, I can certainly understand your reaction to that comment. You and your doctor are the ones in postion to know how symptomatic you are and if there are problems with you driving. It would be wise to ask your doctor if he has any suggestions or concerns with activities for you, including driving. Your aunt-to-be is most likely very concerned for the baby's safety, and maybe that's her usual level of tact. If so, get used to it, or you'll always be bothered by something she says. Why not just reassure her that your doctor is ok with you driving, you would never drive with symptoms - that you would pull over and wait for help, that the baby is always properly restrained, etc. If you have a cell phone, you have that backup too. If it sets her mind at ease, it will be worth it and she will know that you have done all you can. You might find that she would say something like, "Call me and I'll come get the baby if you ever do feel unable to drive". Now, if only I can remember to be so patient with the next comment from some well-meaning person. Linda

[Cappy]

Re: Driving

As long as your doctor feels you are in no imminent danger, and you are physically able to operate a vehicle then I would pay no attention to what others think. While people have a right to be concerned they should also mind their own business.

[Reenie]

Re: Driving

Bryan, I would definitely be irked too. If you don't have a documented reason not to drive, tell her to mind her own business.

Reenie

[Lisa Salberg]

Re: Driving

These are those issues that really can test relationships. I myself (as most of you know) speak my mind...even if that causes a tension...so my approach may differ from others.
Bryan - I would direct speak to this woman and clearly spell out the truth -You would never do anything to endanger you child, yourself or others. If your medical providers thought that it was in your best interest not to drive they are required to inform you. Your "aunt"' is way out of line with her comments and is not qualified to even suggest an opinion on the matter.

Or if you want simply print out this posting and hand it to her

Be well,
Lisa

[bryan]

Re: Driving

I thank you all for your replys. And will act on the great advice given

Thank you
Bryan

[Bert]

Re: Driving

Bryan,

I can certainly understand why a comment like that would irk you. I felt the same way when my son was told "no more competitive sports". People would say to me that we needed to "get over it". "There are always the fine and performing arts among other things, that he can always participate in and are far less dangerous to his health". Those type of statements felt at the time very insensitive.

It's amazing when someone makes a comment about something that we cherish as much as our driving privileges. I agree with Lisa in that I wouldn't listen to anyone that is not qualified medical personnel. Although, driving is something that I had brought up before and didn't get much play on it. It seems to be one of the last privileges that gets taken away. I'm often amazed, and I'm not suggesting here that you fall in that category here, with who is allowed to jump behind the wheel of a car, eventhough it can potentially put others in danger.

Just keep it under a 100 mph and everything will be fine. Best of luck and don't worry about the old aunt. She probably didn't have any malicious intent behind her comment.

Bert

[Ken Crawford]

Re: Driving

Why are we all so touchy on this. I'm sure the Aunt was only being protective. I know there have been times I should not have been driving because of symptoms. I try not to be offended if peoples intent is good. [/b]

[Toogoofy317]

Re: Driving

I think the reason we are being touchy on this is because we have had so much already taken from us! Things that we used to take for granted are now out of our reach!

I know now because I have my defibrillator most places will not allow you to drive the company vehicles. You are too much of a liability they say. For most people that is not a big deal but to someone like me who is an EMT if I can't drive the company vehicle (ambulance) then I am out of the prospects for a job! Even though the ICD has never fired or recorded anything for that matter.

Driving is not the only thing though. We have had to give up sports. It kills me everytime my friends decide to play basketball. Because I get to sit and watch even though I probably could beat them!

In the past 1 1/2 years I have had a lot taken away from me, including two careers and when someone other than my doctor tells me I shouldn't be doing things. Especially things he's said it is okay to do I get a little irked about it!

Just my touchy two cents about it!

Mary S.

[Lisa Salberg]

Re: Driving

I can certainly understand why a comment like that would irk you. I felt the same way when my son was told "no more competitive sports". People would say to me that we needed to "get over it". "There are always the fine and performing arts among other things, that he can always participate in and are far less dangerous to his health". Those type of statements felt at the time very insensitive.

Bert I do not see these issues as the same and I want to be clear on that. Medical data show that competitive sports are a risk to someone with HCM. There is no question about that. Someones Aunt making a comment about not driving with a child in the car is a far different situation.

Lisa

[bryan]

Re: Driving

The only reason why I think I was really "touchy" is because the way it was brought out. Some one not even knowing what the letters, HCM stands for can make a commnet like that. I know it was probably intended in a safe manner, But I dont feel I am in anymore, or any less danger than the person driving infront of me. Anyone on any given day can pass out for a number of reasons. My fiances father fainted going to the bathroom, and is completley healthy.

[Bert]

Re: Driving

At the rate of over 40,000 people dying in car accidents every year, one would think that even the slightest medical risk would be factored in. Driving a vehicle is not something to be taken lightly as it can often involve other people's well-being. The point I was trying to make with the sports eligibility comparison, was that driving is something that we all cherish HCM or no HCM, and god forbid they take that privilege away from us. Sort of comes across as a double standard to me. But, the question still remains... Who's at greater risk here?

Take care all,

Bert

[Linda]

Re: Driving

Let's forget the aunt's comment for a moment and just talk about driving. Like it or not, if someone with a heart problem, diabetes, seizures, etc, is involved in a driving incident, their medical issue could put their license in jeopardy. It's easier to keep the license than it would be to get it back. My son had his ICD prior to driving age. He had to have his own medical investigator with the MVA and a physical and letter from his cardiologist yearly for the first few years of renewal. So yes, anything could happen to anyone at any time, but if you know you are having a difficult day, don't take chances. Also, don't try to sugarcoat it with your insurer, it could invalidate the policy if they discovered you didn't give them proper info. We also had to submit a physical to the insurance co and letter from the cardiologist. I realize each state has it's own set of guidelines, but prob not a lot of difference. Linda

[Toogoofy317]

Re: Driving

With the whole driving issue. I agree if you have had issues such as an ICD firing or frequent episodes of syncope with out prior warning maybe your driving priviliges should be suspended until a satisfactory period of time has elapsed between episodes.

In Florida it is six months after impant before you are legally allowed to drive again. If it does fire your liscense is again withheld for six months. They say that is a suitable period to tell if you are a risk.

Also, if we started jerking liscenses everytime someone had a potential medical condition most of the U.S. would be walking. Look how many Americans have diabetes! If you go into diabetic shock you could crash your car. Or how many people have Coronary Artery disease? They are at a higher risk for a heart attack. Most of my EMS runs here in Florida were for people passing out in the heat . Does that mean they are now ineligble to drive too. Once you start where do you stop

I guess my point is no matter how you look at it the roads are not safe; and not just because of people who have medical conditions. I am more afraid of the drunk driver or the tourist that doesn't know which side of the road to drive on than the possibility of someone going into cardiac arrest. Sometime's the government gives us the choice with our privilages. If we abuse those privilages weather it is driving when we are feeling ill or grabing a can of beer we will face many of the same consequences because of the descision that wemade

Enough with my ranting. Thanks for listening!

Mary S.

[Ken Crawford]

Re: Driving

It seems to me this has gone a bit further than the original question. I do not see where anyone has proposed to take our driving privileges away. The question was if the aunt was 'in the wrong'. I believe she was but only because of ignorance and not anything else. One of the things I have worked on, is to realize, as some of you have said, that anything can happen to anybody at anytime and not just to those of us who have heart disease.