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Nov. 10, 2000

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  • Nov. 10, 2000

    [Nov. 10, 2000]

    Author: Janessa (---.dialsprint.net)

    Date: 11-10-02 11:48

    On this day 2 years ago I lost my mom. Wondra Cannon. My mother, the best. I know we all think that about our moms and we are all right. Mothers are so special. There are no words that can express how much I miss her.

    This disease continues to render me speechless, and that's alot because I ALWAYS have something to say. My family. My life has been torn apart. De to HCM. Nevertheless, I continue to embrace my disease because it is a part of me. It takes and takes, never giving anything in return. In spite of this disease, I was able to give my mother her first two grandchildren (something the docs said I would not be able to survive). She was there to see both of them come into the world. Miracles. They both miss their Granny so much, as do I. I know she's looking down on us and I will do my best to continue to make her proud.

    So today I will go about my day as I always do. Holding on to thoughts of my mommy. Remembering conversations, remembering the laughter, remembering her smile and her loving heart. I pray that I continue to be around and allowed to be at least 1/2 of the mother to my kids that my mom was to me.

    All who will read this know how precious life is and how we dare not take it for granted. I see HCM as any other character defect that I have ( and I have plenty). I work on it to the best of my ability and pray about it. Stay blessed.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    [Re: Nov. 10, 2000]

    Author: Lisa Salberg (---.dyn.optonline.net)

    Date: 11-10-02 12:02

    Your mother is with you today and everyday...she is with your children as they sleep and play, she is in your heart, thoughts and deeds. She knows you are as good of a mother as she... and because of her maybe even better.. She knows that HCM is part of you and it is a battle you face each day with couurage and strength. She may have left this earth but she will never leave you.

    Try not to cry in memory of her...but smile and remember all the good and know that someday...you will be together again, until then you have things to do here.

    You will be in my thoughts today.

    Sincerely,

    Lisa

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    [Re: Nov. 10, 2000]

    Author: Linda (---.wmnsmd.adelphia.net)

    Date: 11-10-02 15:51

    Janessa, It's just 2 months tomorrow that I lost my mother, though not to HCM, but other heart and health problems. She was the last living grandparent my children had. I'm so grateful they got to know her, she knew them, and I was with her when she actually breathed her last. We take so much for granted but HCM changes our way of thinking. In a strange sort of way, it has given to all of us - a better appreciation of each day. Enjoy your children today and every day, just the way you know your Mom enjoyed you. Thinking of you, Linda

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    [Re: Nov. 10, 2000]

    Author: Amy Williams (---.proxy.aol.com)

    Date: 11-11-02 18:14

    Janessa,

    I lost my mother in May 2002 to HCM when I was 7 months pregnant with my 3rd child. Her grandchildren were everything to her. It was devastating that she wasn't there for the birth of my 2month old daughter, Chloe. I related, so much to everything that you said. It is quite amazing how much you can miss your mother...it's so much worse than I ever imagined it would be. I hope and pray that she is watching over me and my family. Some days i think I can really feel her. other days, I just feel like she is gone...and it is so painful. Like you, I also have HCM, as does my oldest child. I hate this condition. However, I do feel that it is part of me, and has made me who I am. Because I have it I can relate to and help others who are in a similar situation. Because, I have it and lost my mother to it, I know the value of life and loved ones. Because I have it, I am a better and stronger person. Of course I wish my life was never touched by HCM, but it has given me some gifts...for all it has taken.

    Please feel free to email me if you want to talk or vent...I truly know what you are going through.

    Best wishes, Amy

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    [Re: Nov. 10, 2000]

    Author: Janessa (---.dialsprint.net)

    Date: 11-11-02 20:56

    Thank you for the words of encouragement. It's kind of hard to be sad with a silly 4 year old running around making jokes and just loving life along with an 8 year old that's full of questions about everything. We delivered our two dozen roses to Granny and I could just feel her smiling down on us. The weather here was beautiful and it was just a beautiful day in spite of my pain. We laughed. We looked at pictures and we just remembered.My mom loved Al Jarreau so we listened. I watched while they danced. I know that my daughter doesn't really remember her as well as my son does but you would never know it to hear her talk about her Granny. It was a good day. Again, thanks to you all who thought about us. Stay Blessed.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    [Re: Nov. 10, 2000]

    Author: Carrie (---.proxy.aol.com)

    Date: 11-11-02 21:49

    How was your pregnancies? I'm not planning on having kids for a while but I still want to be informed. Did you do anything special? Did you turn off your defibrillator during the labor?

    Also, thank you for sharing your story!

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    [Re: Nov. 10, 2000]

    Author: Janessa (---.dialsprint.net)

    Date: 11-13-02 14:37

    I've only had my defibrillator 1year and about 7 months so I didn't have it with either of my pregnancies. (My heart was in much better condition pre-kids).

    As for the pregnancies they were very interesting. I was put on bedrest with both of them at about 3months.I had AN EXTREME amount of passing out during the first few months with both of them. After that, early labor was the biggest issue, with the exception of delivery. It was explained that the loss of fluid so rapidly with delivery had the potential to cause problems but I skated both times. They both really went well but we played it really safe. I saw a high risk OB and was required to go in for prenatal care EVERY week for the ENTIRE pregnancy, I saw my cardiologist once a month. As I got into about my 5th, maybe 6th month I really felt great: Palpatations gave me a break, chest pain eased up, I really could tolerate more physically then I could without being pregnant.Just alot of doctor and hospital time. By the time I delivered I knew the entire maternity staff at the hospital!!! My daughters' HCM was discovered while I was still pregnant during a routine sonogram. I did suffer a small stroke after my first delivery. Very small.

    I was blessed enough that boredom was my only real complaint. But that left me the time to create wonderful scrap books that my kids really love.
    NOTE: This is a post from the previous forum message board.

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